SPARTA News June 2004

June 2004

SPARTA Chapter President’s Corner

- by Brad Carson

June brings us another summer here in North Carolina, and for me a new job. On June 7th, I began a new job at Duke Healthcare (Duke HealthCare Technology Solutions - DHTS) in Durham. It feels good to be back in the systems game full time again. I enjoyed my time working at GSK, but the temporary nature of being a limited term employee (i.e. contractor) for HP Management Services always had me a little on edge.

The big lessons that I've learned during the last six months:

Networking - always keep in touch with contacts. It was because of people I know that I was able to find work at GSK and DHTS. I want to thank John Bryant for letting me know about the position at GSK and Nancy Carden of LabCorp for giving me the lead that lead to work at DHTS.

Resumes - Always have hardcopy and softcopy resumes available. I prefer the softcopy ones since they can be easily tailored for the job being applied for. Also make sure that you always include a cover letter with any resume that you submit.

Websites - Constantly check the big websites (Monster, Dice, Computerjobs) and the local ones (News & Observer, State of North Carolina). For z/OS positions they tend not to have many listings so you have to look pretty close for relevant work.

Patience - You have to have a lot of it when looking for work these days. I've had to just keep at it until something came along. Fortunately having the part-time work from DDA was a big help to me after being treated so poorly by LabCorp.

Now I'm back in the learning curve of things working with IOF again (yea!), trying to remember how to navigate around Mainview, fighting with VPS printers, and becoming Mr. RACF. I'm going to enjoy working in a smaller shop again; you get to work with so many different things.

This month we will see a presentation from Dan Myers of IBM about the z/890 systems that were introduced earlier this year. I look forward to seeing you all on the 29th at LabCorp RTP. Be sure to ask for Tommy Thomas. BarBQ, drinks, and dessert will be provided.

2004-2005 SPARTA
Board of Directors

Brad Carson - President
Duke Health Technology Services 919-286-6392
2200 West Main Street, Suite 910
Durham, NC 27705

Duane Reaugh - Vice President
DTS Software 919-833-8426
2913 Wake Forest Road
Raleigh, NC 27609-7841

Mike Lockey - Secretary
Guilford Co. Information Services 336-641-6235
201 N. Eugene St. 336-227-2021 (Home)
Greensboro, NC 27401

Tommy Thomas - Treasurer
LabCorp 336-436-4178
231 Maple Ave, Koury Ctr 3rd Fl. 919-361-7267
Burlington, NC 27215

Ed Webb - Communications Director
SAS Institute 919-531-4162
SAS Campus Drive 919-362-0232 (Home)
Cary, NC 27513

Meetings

Meetings are scheduled for the last Tuesday evening of each month (except no meeting in December), with optional dinner at 6:15 p.m. and the meeting beginning at 7:00 p.m.

These monthly meetings usually are held at LabCorp’s Center for Molecular Biology and Pathology (CMBP) near the Research Triangle Park (see last page). Take I-40 to Miami Boulevard and go north. Turn right onto Alexander Drive. Go about a mile or so. Then turn right into LabCorp complex and turn Left to the CMBP Building. In the lobby, sign in as a visitor to see Tommy Thomas. Tommy will escort you to the conference room.

Call for Articles

If you have any ideas for speakers, presentations, newsletter articles, or are interested in taking part in a presentation, PLEASE contact one of the Board of Directors with your suggestions.

Newsletter Mailings

The SPARTA chapter policy is to mail a copy of the monthly chapter newsletter to each SPARTA member, NaSPA national, each advertiser, persons who have requested a copy, and to other chapters who send us a copy of their newsletter. The newsletter is mailed about the 20th of each month so you can prepare for the meeting. The mailing list is maintained by Mike Lockey at (336) 412-6235; if you have corrections or problems receiving your newsletter, call Mike.

May 2004 CBT Tape Online

The directory and files from the latest CBT tape V465 (dated May 2, 2004) are available from www.cbttape.org.

If you need help obtaining one or more files, contact Brad Carson at DHTS or Ed Webb at SAS (see Board of Director’s list for contact info).

Minutes of the May 25th, 2004 Meeting

•Meeting was called to order at 7:00 PM by Brad Carson, the Chapter President.

•Thirteen (13) people were present; all were members.

•Everyone in the room introduced themselves, told where they worked, and briefly described their job function.

•The minutes of April 2004 meeting were accepted as published in the May 2004 newsletter.

•Tommy Thomas, the Chapter Treasurer, gave the Treasurer's report.

As of May 25, 2004, the balance is $1449.52. Motion was made and approved to accept the Treasurer's Report.

OLD BUSINESS

•Articles are needed for this newsletter. If you would like to write an article for this newsletter, please contact Ed Webb. Keep in mind that you don't really need to write the article, it can be an article that you read that you would like to share with the membership.

•The SPARTA Web page is available. To access the SPARTA Web page, point your Web browser to this site: http://www.spartanc.org. Please send any comments or suggestions about the Web page to Mike Lockey. Be sure to check the Web page every once in a while to see any new or changed information.

•Brad reminded everyone to continue keeping the conference room clean.


NEW BUSINESS

•Future Speakers and Topics:
(subject to change)

June 2004 IBM z890 by Dan Myers of IBM
July 2004 Cornerstone

If you have suggestions about speakers and topics, contact Duane Reaugh.

•Thanks to Tommy Thomas of LabCorp for hosting the May meeting.

•The June SPARTA meeting will be held at LabCorp in RTP.

•Food for the June meeting will be BarBQ, soda and dessert.

•The business portion of the meeting ended at 7:45PM.

•Dave Rivers of Dignus Software gave a presentation titled "What to Know about IFLs".

Topics Dave discussed were:

What is an IFL? IBM Definition

What is an IFL? "real" definition

How is it implemented?

Where is the IFL implemented?

What can you do with an IFL?

Integrated Facility for Linux (IFL)

Actual pricing for IFL

What does an IFL buy me?

Software presently running under Linux

High level assembler is a requirement for some application software

Dignus Systems/ASM is a cost effective alternative to IBM HLASM

Open Questions

Are you using/planning to use Linux?

How long before vendors "wake up" and start charging for IFL mips?

The meeting ended at 8:20 p.m..

Treasurer’s Report for June 2004

contributed by Tommy Thomas

The balance in the account is $ 1416.06 as of June 13, 2004.

Financial Report
2/01/2004 through 06/13/2004

Items of Interest

SPARTA Food Menu for 2004

contributed by Chris Blackshire

June - BarBQ
July - Pizza
Aug. - Chicken
Sept. - Subs
Oct. - BarBQ
Nov. - Pizza


Humor


Top 30 Trek Cliches of All Time

Contributed by Chris Blackshire

30. Any two incidents that happen on a planet will always happen within walking distance of each other. This could be two shuttle craft crashing or landing; a [crash] landing that happens to be near a party of characters already on the surface, etc.

29. Corollary: Whenever a party of characters beams down to the surface of a planet, they are guaranteed to arrive at the one place on the planet where something unusual is about to happen.

28. The incident that happens to the characters always happens within minutes of their arrival.

27. No matter what else goes wrong or gets damaged, two systems will *always* keep working on a starship: The view screen and the artificial gravity.

26. All space-faring civilisations have view screens and artificial gravity. All view screen technology is compatible, even between craft from opposite sides of the galaxy. (none of the PAL vs NTSC type problems we get now...)

25. If you are introduced to a new character, and it is not one of the first three episodes of a new series, that character is certain to die before the end of the series, usually before the end of the episode. Mentioning the fact that they have a family or friends will speed this up further.

24. Damaged systems can be repaired quickly and easily by diverting power from some other system.

23. All computer consoles, especially ones on the bridge, have major power conduits running immediately behind them which explode violently if the ship takes just a couple of hits. Despite this, they will still work perfectly if you return to them after being blasted ten feet in the air.

22. All computer consoles have dozens of buttons, very few of which are actually labelled. No wonder you need to go to academy to learn how to fly these things.

21. However, if an alien race wants to take over the ship, they will be able to understand exactly what every control does. Similarly, the Star Trek crew will be able to understand the control panels of any alien ship they happen to be in.

20. For some reason, Photon Torpedoes or phaser blasts are not guided. Four out of five miss their target, despite the fact that it's a technology we already possess even today. Very wasteful.

19. The Warp Core is a seriously unstable device, which regularly has to be expelled into space for safety reasons, can "breach" with seemingly little provocation, fills the room with dangerous gas/plasma/etc. when the slightest thing goes wrong with it, and yet most of the main characters spend a lot of time standing right next to it, even though the controls could easily be re-routed to any other part of the ship.

18. Characters can often be seen looking down or across into a communications view screen. But whenever you see anyone on your own view screen, they're looking straight ahead into it.

17. All alien cultures have space craft and buildings with sliding doors (which make a 'whoosh' sound when they open). The only exceptions to this are primitive people, who generally have open doorways or at best material covered doorways. Hinged doors seem to have no place in the galaxy... except for 20th century Earth.

16. Universal Translators allow you to understand anything anyone says, but you can still swear in Klingon, and it won't get translated. Likewise, if you're explaining something about your native culture, you can speak words from your native language, and then follow it up by explaining the literal translation... which, assuming the universal translator is working, and you're speaking your native language anyway, would be exactly what you said in the first place... Hmmm....

15. Apart from the odd outburst in native Klingon, Star Trek characters never swear, or even come close to doing so, even when their ship is being blown to pieces.

14. Despite having "inertia dampers" which can overcome the forces involved in jumping to warp 9 from a standing start, the slightest jolt from an external source (weapons, turbulence, etc.) can throw the entire crew out of their seats.

13. Alien races are almost without exception humanoid, breath the same atmosphere, and eat the same food as us. It's even possible to successfully breed between any two species.

12. Humans are the only race in the galaxy who's species name does not correspond to the name of their home planet.

11. All alien names (planets, species and individuals) would score extremely well in Scrabble. Lots of Zs, Ks, Xs and Vs. but strangely, they're still usually pretty easy to pronounce.

10. Time traveling always involves the planet Earth, usually going to the 20th century, and you often land up in the middle of a major historic event. (See also point 30 - you will always end up landing right in the middle of this event (and disrupting it), no matter where in the world it's happening).

9. Also, considering that time travel hasn't been 'invented' yet in Star Trek, they do get to do a remarkable amount of it, but for some reason none of these events has so far actually lead to its invention.

8. Most space craft have a suspiciously aerodynamic shape, despite being designed for space flight, and never going near an atmosphere.

7. Most space craft have the bridge located at the front or top of the ship, even though they use the view screen to see everything and have no windows, or any other reason to be in such a dangerous place. (it's always the first
thing to get blasted when the fighting starts)

6. Star Fleet engineers can solve any problem. I mean *anything*. They always give an estimate on how long a repair will take. Their captain always gives them half as long, and they always manage to get it done in that time. Maybe they deliberately double all their estimates?

5. In space, no-one can hear you scream.... but starships still manage to make a rumbling sound as they fly by.

4. All planets - and even some asteroids - have exactly the same gravity.

3. Any time an unrecognised female makes their presence felt, Kirk or Riker will immediately fall in love with them.

2. The attrition rate among low ranking crew members makes you wonder how anyone ever gets past their first year on board. But yet somehow the senior officers always survive, despite putting themselves in just as much danger.

1. Her (continuing) five year mission, to boldly split infinitives that no man has split before.

Contributed by Chris Blackshire

You Know You're Getting "Marvelously Mature" When...

1. You and your teeth don't sleep together.
2. You try to straighten out the wrinkles in your socks and discover you aren't wearing any.
3. At the breakfast table you hear snap, crackle, pop and you're not eating cereal.
4. Your back goes out but you stay home.
5. When you wake up looking like your driver's license picture.
6. It takes two tries to get up from the couch.
7. When your idea of a night out is sitting on the patio.
8. When happy hour is a nap.
9. When you're on vacation and your energy runs out before your money does.
10. When you say something to your kids that your mother said to you and you always hated it.
11. When all you want for your birthday is to not be reminded of your age.
12. When you step off a curb and look down one more time to make sure the street is still there.
13. Your idea of weight lifting is standing up.
14. It takes longer to rest than it did to get tired.
15. Your memory is shorter and your complaining lasts longer.
16. Your address book has mostly names that start with Dr.
17. You sit in a rocking chair and can't get it going.
18. The pharmacist has become your new best friend.
19. Getting "lucky" means you found your car in the parking lot.
20. The twinkle in your eye is merely a reflection from the sun on your bifocals.
21. It takes twice as long - to look half as good.
22. Everything hurts, and what doesn't hurt - doesn't work.
23. You look for your glasses for half an hour and they were on your head the whole time.
24. You sink your teeth into a steak - and they stay there.
25. You give up all your bad habits and still don't feel good.
26. You have more patience, but it is actually that you just don't care anymore.
27. You finally get your head together and your body starts failing.

Membership Information

Don’t Forget the Next SPARTA Meeting

Tuesday, June 29, 2004

Location: LabCorp in the RTP

Take I-40 to Miami Boulevard and go north. Turn right onto Alexander Drive. Go about a mile or so. Then turn right into LabCorp complex and turn left to the CMBP Building. In the lobby, sign in as a visitor to see Tommy Thomas. Tommy will escort you to the conference room.

Free Food: BarBQ, Drinks, Dessert

Program :

IBM’s April 7th Announcements

Speaker:

Dan Myers of IBM

SPARTA News
P.O. Box 13194
Research Triangle Park, NC 27709-3194












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